


Memoirs a the Vvillain

by causticAmbition



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-09-19
Updated: 2012-09-19
Packaged: 2017-11-14 14:43:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/516311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/causticAmbition/pseuds/causticAmbition
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A retellin a the life an death a Eridan Ampora, high class orphaner in trainin wwith blood almost as rich as it goes. It may not mean much at this point, wwhen I'm floatin in the dream bubbles, but gettin my wword out there is the last shot I'vve got to matterin in the wworld.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memoirs a the Vvillain

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, before anyone says anythin, I'm typin wwith punctuation an wwhatnot to make this story fuckin READABLE, ok, so don't start gettin on my case about howw I wwouldn't do that, cause you don't fuckin knoww anythin.

Memoirs a the Vvillain  
The Prequel  
by E Ampora

* * *

Before I begin, I'm goin to take a moment an say that I nevver meant for it to be this wway. I couldn't havven knowwn this wwas the route my life wwas goin to take, an there wwas nothin that could havve prepared me for the part I wwas goin to play in the grand scheme a things. I knoww admittin that isn't goin to make me faultless in all a this, but I deservve no more blame than the others.  
  
I don't regret wwhat I'vve done. My only wwish wwould be that if wwe had another shot at this, that wwe're givven the foresight to not ignore the signs.

* * *

An so wwe should start at the beginnin a my story. Before anythin else happened, before the dramatics an games an murder, I remember bein a seadwweller. I remember howw simplistic it wwas back then, glidin around under the wwavves like there wwas nothin else to fuckin wworry about in all a Alternia. I remember explorin the great depths a the ocean, goin so deep that the silence rang through my thinkpan an the moons' light had no effect on my surroundins. It wwas quiet, it wwas cold, an it wwas dark.

I don't knoww howw old I wwas then, fuckin around in those underwwater pits. Couldn't havve been much longer than after my pupation, durin that short period a time wwhen I wwas too busy gettin used to the feelin a bein a full growwn troll to humor my lusus' attempts at schoolfeedin me manners. There wwasn't a reason that existed for me to bother dressin up in respectable clothes at that point, an so I deemed it entirely unnecessary to do anythin but wwhat I pleased.

An wwhat I pleased to do wwas wwear a flowwin skirt, made wwith the most obnoxious colors. I hadn't cared for any sort a self image at the time, an I wwas banned from leavvin the hivve wwithout somethin covverin me. It wwas neon purple an pink an grey, wwith some wweird spotted design on it. I don't knoww wwhere I got the damn thing, but the wway it left my legs still feelin unrestrained had me keepin it as a constant part a my wwardrobe.

It's not somethin I'm proud a, but it's the fuckin truth an I figure there's no point in leavvin out any small details about the past ongoins a my life. Dyin sorta makes you apathetic towward the smaller, insignificant things in your memory.

But somethin happened that evvenin that makes it hard to feel guilty about my ignorance. It wwas like all fourty eight fakey fake gods had gathered to perfect a single moment. Wwell, ok, no, it wwas more like fourty SEVVEN gods, cause wwhile I stared at her, wwith neon green an blue an pink streamers hangin out a her hair an ovver her swwimsuit like the designasterator didn't knoww wwhat to do wwith all a this extra ribbon they had layin around so they just fuckin stabled it to a belt an called it a skirt, an she stared at me, wwith my fuckin spotted neon skirt, it wwas pretty obvvious evvery god wwas there makin sure this moment wwas fated except the god a fashion, wwho just so happened to fuck right off.

Anywway, that all started cause I wwas wwanderin too deep wwhere I wwasn't supposed to. Evverythin sounded muted, an the silence that once calmed me noww sent me into a confused panic. I tried swwimmin back up, but I wwas too young for my sense a direction to be all that correct, an instead a meetin the surface a the wwater I wwas greeted wwith kelp, tanglin around my limbs. I must'vve yelled out a surprise or somethin- wwhen you're dowwn in the darkness a the ocean an somethin touches you, youre goin to fuckin freak out wwhether or not you like it-, an next thing I knoww, I'm hearin this odd sort a belloww in return. It wwas a ridiculous noise, one that I'vve yet to hear anythin similar to, more like the wworst attempt at a blubberbeast if I evver heard one than some sort a actual animals call. An you knoww wwhat I did? I fuckin bellowwed right back like the immature douchebag I wwas, cryin out back to this creature that maybe wwouldn't eat me.

I say 'maybe wwouldn't eat me' cause evven trolls eat trolls, that's no secret, an I wwas probably ripe pickin for anyone wwho found me.

But she reaches dowwn into the darkness, grabbin me by the arm an pullin me out, rips me right out a the kelp wwith such a sharp jolt that I float up a couple feet, an then begins swwimmin upwward, draggin me behind her until the darkness no longer wwas ovverwwhelmin to our newwly hatched ocular orbs.

Once I figured out howw sorta embarrassin it wwas to be savved by another troll do I pull out a her grip, shovvin myself awway from her to get a look at my savvior.

An, wwell.

Evven wwith her obnoxious outfit, she wwas the prettiest thing I'd evver seen.


End file.
